Initiative

Yesterday was a pretty good day. I fetched Dylan from school & went home to work in the afternoon. During the evening walk, Dylan was again mostly able to monitor my actions, as I vary my speed of walking. At one point, when he plonked himself outside a school to touch the the bumpy texture, after perhaps a minute of my standing in a short distance & he didn't move toward me, I made a "Oops" sound, he looked up for a moment but didn't come toward me, so I said "let's go" and started moving further away from him, & he got up & followed me. Yeah!

Today is even better, we spent a long time in Botanic Gardens, feeding fish & walking/running. He did pretty nicely mostly, but initially got me so upset by eating fish food & also sticking his hand into the fish pond even as I told him not to touch the water & to only throw the fish food in. His standing/running too near the edge of swan lake later also got me nervous. But as I sat to ask myself why I should be so upset over his nibbling some fishfood & touching the water, whether what he did is really such a big deal, I relaxed and started to enjoy the walk. Also I realised part of my annoyance came from my disappointment that my friend & her kid who agreed to meet up couldn't join us. There were various points I was walking really fast (in agitation) & he ran to keep pace with me without resistance, and as I slowed down, I can see his monitoring increasing.

We also had a good relaxed time at the cafe where he enjoyed the pasta (without the gravy) & dipping excessive amounts of ketchup with his chicken nuggets & fries.

Before we reached home, he fell asleep. He had a peaceful nap, and a couple of times he opened his eyes when I was at the bed & he just closed his eyes again. Once he got up & went into my room quietly to look for me & settled back to sleep when I carried him back to his bed. This is different from the crying that was previously common.

The best situation was when we were about to go out (to my parents' place for my Dad's 72nd birthday dinner) & I helped him put on his new shoes. I then put on 1 of my sports shoes but as the other one was behind him & I couldn't reach it, I suggested for him to stand up so I could get it. But without prompting, he looked at the shoe I had on & turned around & reached out for the matching shoe next to him, and gave it to me! I was elated by his increased observation and monitoring & most of all his initiative to take action! I thanked & hugged & praised him & he looked really pleased! What a great moment!

My siblings also comment on Dylan's increased regulation & sociability, smiling at his uncles & aunts & hugging some of his cousins - he's particularly keen to hug 2 of them, a 6-year-old girl & a 9 year old boy.

However, on the MRT train, particularly for one that's crowded & a long ride (16 stations to Pasir Ris), he still has not so appropriate behaviours, in that he doesn't sit still, moving around & sometimes accidentally hit the person sitting next to us with a suddenly flung out arm, being noisy & tapping surfaces loudly etc. Thankfully, he enjoys the ride now, unlike in the past when he could cry most of the journey or run around wildly & refusing to settle down. Now, I'm able to calm him by letting him do some beading sitting on my lap, and when the train is less crowded & we each have a seat, to let him do a puzzle. I also brought a book but it didn't keep him engaged.

Anyway, it would be great to see more of the type of initiative he showed today passing me my shoe.