So after Oma has seen Dylan in such positive light for a couple of days, she gets to experience his crying / drama too.
SWIMMING FUN
On Sunday after church, we went to our usual Keppel club swimming. Dylan was of course elated and couldn't wait so I changed him first and he started playing in the wading pool first. However, as I returned after having changed to my swimming costume, I found Dad bringing him back. He had run off to the jacuzzi which is at the far end up a slope on his own! As Dad let go of his hand when they reached the kids' pool, he again made a run for it. So when they came back, I told him as he did not stop but ran off on his own, he'll have to sit for 5 minutes. He sat with us (my hand on his lap), and he didn't struggle much, and decided to eat a little with us. Subsequently after swimming with me using swimming noodles to the far end, he again tried running off, and did not respond to my demand for him to "stop", I ran after him & we sat down for 5 mins as his time-out. He accepted it.
I noticed that when I walked to the jacuzzi with him, and he's way ahead and pulling me & I stop, even though it's a place he's so keen on, he stops and considers a while, and backtrack to join me. Must say this would not have been possible in the past. Also, despite not having armbands, he's confident to jump into the water with me. We didn't film this, but as I stop and decided to go to another spot to jump, he goes along, and didn't struggle.
After we swam and soaked in the jacuzzi, and we thought for sure he would have a good nap when we went home and he has his rice milk, but he didn't after an hour. So I decided we shall all go shopping, since Oma had requested.
RESTAURANT DRAMA
Not too unexpectedly, he fell asleep (notwithstanding the noise) in his old stroller which has been tucked away for months. So we could shop easily. But the unfortunate thing was he slept from 6-8pm, and as he woke in a Japanese restaurant, he started crying, very loudly. He screamed his lungs out & wanted to be carried, and not allow me to sit down. He also pulled my bag and shove into my hands, indicating I should take it and go out. No amount of huddling would stop the crying, so I had no choice but to bring him out, and he continued the frantic crying for another 30 minutes. I tried praying with him/ for him & it didn't stop. I noticed unlike in the past, I don't feel desperate and know the storm will tide over, in his time. I hushed him and hugged his head to me, but I told him I can't carry him till he calms down and stop crying. I told him not to be scared, although we're in a different place, mommy's here, and that only he can calm himself down.
Finally as his crying ease off, I brought him to walk some stairs, to be sure he's stable. It helps greatly and he finally broke into big smiles and we returned to the restaurant. Though he didn't eat much, as the tempura ordered for him is no longer crispy, and we ordered something else for him, he looked happy and kept looking over the other table, and in Oma's word, was flirting with a little girl.
Then last night, notwithstanding a great time playing 2 new 24-piece puzzles and a nice walk with me and Oma, he again cried very hard for half an hour at bedtime, and only slept at 1am.
Oh by the way, I only discovered on Sunday that his headphones are damaged (no sound on the right). No wonder he rejects them. Got them fixed yesterday (cost $55 - ouch! but thankfully the Sennheiser service personnel are very helpful) and hopefully now the Samonas therapy (Nocturne) can help him with sense of security.
Awaiting for the storm to be fully over!
Monday, December 17, 2007
Saturday, December 15, 2007
New Progress & Oma's visit
After the last "spiritual experience" /episode I wrote about, the following day (4 Dec) Dylan had another crying episode. This time we were trying to get him interested in riding on the bike, now that we managed to pump the deflated tires with the new pump. However he wasn't interested. Mel & I brought him downstairs, thinking he will for sure recall the fun he had on it before. He was quite crazy over it when we just bought the bikes. But whether it's me cycling circling around, or Mel, it just didn't get him excited. So we gave it up & I requested Mel to bring the bike home & it's time with mommy to go walking. He started feeling insecure & started to cry.
He really wanted to go home but followed me up the flight of stairs towards the community club where there's a favourite playground nearby, still crying. He kept running back about 10 steps from me towards our block, but came back to me when I didn't follow him. After crying about half an hour at the nearby exercise corner, I thought he needed to go wee-wee so suggested bringing him to the community club toilet, but he didn't want to go. Then I said I needed to go and please to let me go, even if he didn't need to. First he prevented me, but when he saw that I was still going, he followed me, holding my t-shirt, and stopped crying. We then actually managed to have a nice short walk, and I gave him a short break at another playground.
From that day onwards, there's no more major crying episodes. Hallelujah! I'm so glad also as Juergen's mom is coming over on 14 Dec to stay with us for 3 weeks, and what trauma it would be for her if he continues like this! But thank God he feels secure again, and particpates keenly on our walk and stair-climbing again!
But we do have a new issue since the previous RDI on 1 Dec when we fed the swans & tortoises, as Dylan thinks it's fun to throw things - on that day he threw his chewy tube/hammer which the tortoises tried to covet & which Juergen and park-ranger so heroically retrieved, & he's thrown half-eaten sweet potato from the second floor of Vivo mall, in the cab, unknown stuff downstairs, smashed a bottle of medicine, when previously he would only knock gently on the floor to hear the sound etc. Anyway, we decided not to practice the throwing bread to feed exercise for sender-receiver framework for now.
Then Juergen also fed back to me one day (after Dylan's unsuccessful speech assessment on 11 Dec at AAS, unsuccessful as he was unwilling/unable to point to pictures of objects he's asked to identify, although he did quite consistently pick out the right toys for the assessor) of how much imperative speech & scolding I was into, saying ouch when Dylan steps on me/pull my hair, sometimes going back to my old ways of talking non-stop that he suggested I record myself for half an hour. Anyway, I guess I couldn't accept immediately but realised it's a good thing he pointed that out so I could go back interacting with Dylan in a more reflected (& non-reactive) way. I also took the chance to tell him we really need & request him to be present (body, mind & spirit) with us more often, and I think it was well-taken.
I also had a sort of crisis as my attempt to arrange to work part-time at my current job doesn't seem to be feasible currently.
Since Mom's stay with us 2 days ago, everything's been generally good & peaceful. We have more meals together, and even though Dylan still rather stands on his seat to eat, he doesn't run off so often. We went to Sentosa for a beachside walk after dinner, on Mom's day of arrival, yesterday we went to McRitichie - good thing we gave up on the idea of doing 10km walk as Dylan wasn't really ready to walk long distances, and wanted to be carried quite shortly into the boardwalk.
The progress I noticed is that he's able to take more variations - like my jogging/running then suddenly stop. Sometimes he tries to initiate and run very fast I may go along for a short while, but if I find he's initiating and just expecting me to catch up, I would stop. When he also stops & realises he's ahead of me, he would think for a while & even be able to take 1 or 2 steps towards me! It's really great to see that!
Also at the beach, even though he really wanted to sit in the sand or step further into deeper waters but I stop him, and told him we cannot swim tonite - it's too dark & we're not prepared I told him, see, we have no swiming costume), he would restrain his urge and just stand at the edge of the waters, and kick water instead. He's really come a long way and I'm so proud of him!
Last nite at the exercise corner, I noticed he's much more willing to let me help him with the different exercises. Whereas previously he would run off the moment I come over to assist him. While he still sometimes want to touch say parts meant for the feet & I told him no, it's for stepping on, he would not persist in the touching but instead step on it. He's also more coordinated in the "rower" & even the exercise where one sits (he stands) & pull the handle bars down to raise oneself! He stayed regulated, and let's me help him push all the way down, as he's still not strong enough to go all the way.
The biggest bonus last night was that after a fun neighbourhood walk to the exercise corner & he's feeling really happy with himself, in the lift I squatted to be at eye-level with him & I told him how much I enjoyed the walk together with him, daddy & oma, & I told him I love him & I pucker my lips & say kiss, he leaned over and have his lips touch/kiss mine, & when he let go & I puckered my lips again, his again gave me his lips & this kissing (regulatory pattern) was repeated several times. I'm really elated!
Oh yes, almost forgot to update that since our first session at Jinshin Jyutsu (pronounced jitsu) on 8 Dec (before the RDI home visit session), Mel & I have been doing certain exercises with Dylan when he sleeps (exercise involves our holding a finger & toe 5 mins each till all 10 are done) & we can feel his pulses & I'm wondering if this has contributed to his improvement.
By the way, I also notice Dylan's repertoire of foods he eats increasing- in fact, last night I noted he's eating all the stuff in his plate, which is exactly as we are eating except for the raw veggie salad (beef, broccoli, sweet peas, mushrooms, brown rice) and not his usual faves of fried chicken. This is really great!
He really wanted to go home but followed me up the flight of stairs towards the community club where there's a favourite playground nearby, still crying. He kept running back about 10 steps from me towards our block, but came back to me when I didn't follow him. After crying about half an hour at the nearby exercise corner, I thought he needed to go wee-wee so suggested bringing him to the community club toilet, but he didn't want to go. Then I said I needed to go and please to let me go, even if he didn't need to. First he prevented me, but when he saw that I was still going, he followed me, holding my t-shirt, and stopped crying. We then actually managed to have a nice short walk, and I gave him a short break at another playground.
From that day onwards, there's no more major crying episodes. Hallelujah! I'm so glad also as Juergen's mom is coming over on 14 Dec to stay with us for 3 weeks, and what trauma it would be for her if he continues like this! But thank God he feels secure again, and particpates keenly on our walk and stair-climbing again!
But we do have a new issue since the previous RDI on 1 Dec when we fed the swans & tortoises, as Dylan thinks it's fun to throw things - on that day he threw his chewy tube/hammer which the tortoises tried to covet & which Juergen and park-ranger so heroically retrieved, & he's thrown half-eaten sweet potato from the second floor of Vivo mall, in the cab, unknown stuff downstairs, smashed a bottle of medicine, when previously he would only knock gently on the floor to hear the sound etc. Anyway, we decided not to practice the throwing bread to feed exercise for sender-receiver framework for now.
Then Juergen also fed back to me one day (after Dylan's unsuccessful speech assessment on 11 Dec at AAS, unsuccessful as he was unwilling/unable to point to pictures of objects he's asked to identify, although he did quite consistently pick out the right toys for the assessor) of how much imperative speech & scolding I was into, saying ouch when Dylan steps on me/pull my hair, sometimes going back to my old ways of talking non-stop that he suggested I record myself for half an hour. Anyway, I guess I couldn't accept immediately but realised it's a good thing he pointed that out so I could go back interacting with Dylan in a more reflected (& non-reactive) way. I also took the chance to tell him we really need & request him to be present (body, mind & spirit) with us more often, and I think it was well-taken.
I also had a sort of crisis as my attempt to arrange to work part-time at my current job doesn't seem to be feasible currently.
Since Mom's stay with us 2 days ago, everything's been generally good & peaceful. We have more meals together, and even though Dylan still rather stands on his seat to eat, he doesn't run off so often. We went to Sentosa for a beachside walk after dinner, on Mom's day of arrival, yesterday we went to McRitichie - good thing we gave up on the idea of doing 10km walk as Dylan wasn't really ready to walk long distances, and wanted to be carried quite shortly into the boardwalk.
The progress I noticed is that he's able to take more variations - like my jogging/running then suddenly stop. Sometimes he tries to initiate and run very fast I may go along for a short while, but if I find he's initiating and just expecting me to catch up, I would stop. When he also stops & realises he's ahead of me, he would think for a while & even be able to take 1 or 2 steps towards me! It's really great to see that!
Also at the beach, even though he really wanted to sit in the sand or step further into deeper waters but I stop him, and told him we cannot swim tonite - it's too dark & we're not prepared I told him, see, we have no swiming costume), he would restrain his urge and just stand at the edge of the waters, and kick water instead. He's really come a long way and I'm so proud of him!
Last nite at the exercise corner, I noticed he's much more willing to let me help him with the different exercises. Whereas previously he would run off the moment I come over to assist him. While he still sometimes want to touch say parts meant for the feet & I told him no, it's for stepping on, he would not persist in the touching but instead step on it. He's also more coordinated in the "rower" & even the exercise where one sits (he stands) & pull the handle bars down to raise oneself! He stayed regulated, and let's me help him push all the way down, as he's still not strong enough to go all the way.
The biggest bonus last night was that after a fun neighbourhood walk to the exercise corner & he's feeling really happy with himself, in the lift I squatted to be at eye-level with him & I told him how much I enjoyed the walk together with him, daddy & oma, & I told him I love him & I pucker my lips & say kiss, he leaned over and have his lips touch/kiss mine, & when he let go & I puckered my lips again, his again gave me his lips & this kissing (regulatory pattern) was repeated several times. I'm really elated!
Oh yes, almost forgot to update that since our first session at Jinshin Jyutsu (pronounced jitsu) on 8 Dec (before the RDI home visit session), Mel & I have been doing certain exercises with Dylan when he sleeps (exercise involves our holding a finger & toe 5 mins each till all 10 are done) & we can feel his pulses & I'm wondering if this has contributed to his improvement.
By the way, I also notice Dylan's repertoire of foods he eats increasing- in fact, last night I noted he's eating all the stuff in his plate, which is exactly as we are eating except for the raw veggie salad (beef, broccoli, sweet peas, mushrooms, brown rice) and not his usual faves of fried chicken. This is really great!
Monday, December 3, 2007
Peace after the storm
Last night I came home to find Dylan at the kitchen table, having eaten partially 4-5 pieces of fried chicken, and running off his high chair, and going off to grab another 2 (the last) from another plate. We subsequently moved his plate to the dining table to join me, and for a short while, it's really nice, as he also feeds himself using the spoon to shovel his rice. He likes the organic brown rice mixed with Nordic Natural Cod liver oil, and potassium salt (he'd be happy with regular salt too). Only issue is after sitting for a while, he likes to stand up and eat from the standing position, which is not only unsafe, and keep us on our guard to protect him from falling over, he also drops more food due to the longer distance for the food to reach his mouth. Then he really doesn't want to sit down due to the messy chair. Attempts to keep him seated results in struggles and he may even rather just jump off the chair & run off.
Anyway, as it seemed like he had enough, I turned on his previously favourite video, Richard Scary's Counting video but he decided to stay on to eat some more. After dinner, he went over with Mel to sit at the sofa to watch the rest of the video and became very interested, looking keenly, recalling and swaying to the music. He hasn't appeared the least interested in videos for a long time. And Mel's recent attempts to calm him using videos didn't work. After I'm done, I played with him, letting him do his favourite puzzles and later letting him swing - his preference is to lie on the swing on his tummy and kick very hard and swing really high. But last night when obstructed from swinging on the tummy (and told he can swing seated/ standing up), he cooperated quite readily and sat down, and looked at me very keenly as I pulled the swing seat towards me, and let go.
Anyway, as he woke early yesterday, and only slept on the bus journey home (waking upon reaching home), he got tired when it was past 8.30 pm. I tried to interested him to help me pump air in the bicycle tires so that we could ride it a while. But he started crying and calling for "Arty", wanting me to open the kitchen door which was locked. Then the crying escalated, as I firmly told him first he has to stop crying, and Aunty was doing housework in the kitchen. Now is time with mommy.
I tried to bring him to climb stairs to regulate him, and he did monitor me sometimes, but he continued crying. I told him I'll bring you home but first you have to calm down and stop crying, otherwise we cannot go home. Anyway, we ended up downstairs at the exercise corner -where he usually enjoys the monkey bar with my help, but he cried so loud and hard for an hour. In between when he's only sobbing & seems to be calming down, he actually wanted to do the monkey bar with my help. I'm not sure if he thought that's what I wanted him to do so let's get it out of the way so we can go home.
At various points I really felt at my wits' end - I could see some lower floor neighbours looking out the window & I think the whole 2 adjacent blocks can hear - we stay on the 21st floor & Mel could hear it loud and clear too. Anyway, at one point when I was trying to relax at the bench & he was standing on the bench facing me (so we were about eye-level), I could see he was frantic, with eyes looking all over, and I used my palms as blinders so he'll look at me. He still tried to look left & right upwards, but eventually looked into my eyes, I managed to get his attention to pray together. I asked him to pray after me: "Dear Jesus" & he said "dee jiser" and even though he didn't continue to imitate what I say afterwards asking Jesus to protect him & keep him safe and secure, he stopped his crying completely and was calm and at peace. After the prayer, I hugged him and assured him that I truly love him and I carried him upstairs. He rested his head very peacefully over my shoulder. There wasn't even sobbing vs earlier on when he continued to cry & scream even when I carried him. (When I told Jürgen about this amazing miracle, he called it Dylan's spiritual experience.)
Even when we reached home, he cooperated in letting me help him wash up and brush teeth and that night he was peaceful. After I washed up & came to join him to say a goodnite prayer, he let me huddle him, and wanted me to stay. It was kinda cute, when I or Mel raised our heads to talk to each other (as we were on two sides of Dylan), he wanted us both to lie down. At least I know he's not angry with me but accepts me and know that I love him. Thank God!
He slept well and woke without crying this morning, and he got a bonus, riding the cab to school (at least part of the jorney) with Daddy. Praying that this peace remains with him.
Anyway, as it seemed like he had enough, I turned on his previously favourite video, Richard Scary's Counting video but he decided to stay on to eat some more. After dinner, he went over with Mel to sit at the sofa to watch the rest of the video and became very interested, looking keenly, recalling and swaying to the music. He hasn't appeared the least interested in videos for a long time. And Mel's recent attempts to calm him using videos didn't work. After I'm done, I played with him, letting him do his favourite puzzles and later letting him swing - his preference is to lie on the swing on his tummy and kick very hard and swing really high. But last night when obstructed from swinging on the tummy (and told he can swing seated/ standing up), he cooperated quite readily and sat down, and looked at me very keenly as I pulled the swing seat towards me, and let go.
Anyway, as he woke early yesterday, and only slept on the bus journey home (waking upon reaching home), he got tired when it was past 8.30 pm. I tried to interested him to help me pump air in the bicycle tires so that we could ride it a while. But he started crying and calling for "Arty", wanting me to open the kitchen door which was locked. Then the crying escalated, as I firmly told him first he has to stop crying, and Aunty was doing housework in the kitchen. Now is time with mommy.
I tried to bring him to climb stairs to regulate him, and he did monitor me sometimes, but he continued crying. I told him I'll bring you home but first you have to calm down and stop crying, otherwise we cannot go home. Anyway, we ended up downstairs at the exercise corner -where he usually enjoys the monkey bar with my help, but he cried so loud and hard for an hour. In between when he's only sobbing & seems to be calming down, he actually wanted to do the monkey bar with my help. I'm not sure if he thought that's what I wanted him to do so let's get it out of the way so we can go home.
At various points I really felt at my wits' end - I could see some lower floor neighbours looking out the window & I think the whole 2 adjacent blocks can hear - we stay on the 21st floor & Mel could hear it loud and clear too. Anyway, at one point when I was trying to relax at the bench & he was standing on the bench facing me (so we were about eye-level), I could see he was frantic, with eyes looking all over, and I used my palms as blinders so he'll look at me. He still tried to look left & right upwards, but eventually looked into my eyes, I managed to get his attention to pray together. I asked him to pray after me: "Dear Jesus" & he said "dee jiser" and even though he didn't continue to imitate what I say afterwards asking Jesus to protect him & keep him safe and secure, he stopped his crying completely and was calm and at peace. After the prayer, I hugged him and assured him that I truly love him and I carried him upstairs. He rested his head very peacefully over my shoulder. There wasn't even sobbing vs earlier on when he continued to cry & scream even when I carried him. (When I told Jürgen about this amazing miracle, he called it Dylan's spiritual experience.)
Even when we reached home, he cooperated in letting me help him wash up and brush teeth and that night he was peaceful. After I washed up & came to join him to say a goodnite prayer, he let me huddle him, and wanted me to stay. It was kinda cute, when I or Mel raised our heads to talk to each other (as we were on two sides of Dylan), he wanted us both to lie down. At least I know he's not angry with me but accepts me and know that I love him. Thank God!
He slept well and woke without crying this morning, and he got a bonus, riding the cab to school (at least part of the jorney) with Daddy. Praying that this peace remains with him.
Sunday, December 2, 2007
Dylan's crying sprees
While sharing with Gen on our recent session (1 Dec) at Botanic Gardens (sender-receiver framework of feeding bread to tortoises & swans) about Dylan's crying sprees, I realise I haven't blogged for the entire month of November, and on relooking at my calendar, I note that his insecurity & crying started around the beginning of November. I was on 2 days PersonPlanet Leadership course at SMU 3-4 Dec (9am-9pm). He was like an angel when we arrived together on day 1, smiling so sweetly & being friendly to Joo Hock, Monica & Annabella. He also seemed quite happy exhibiting his confident self, sitting at his table at the back with our helper Mel, scribbling with the crayons that Monica had so nicely prepared for him. He did make some happy sounds, mostly murmurings / mono-syllabic sounds while seated but was co-operative. But after half an hour or so of the session's commencement, he started getting excited & running off to "mingle" around the other tables, and Mel, to avert him turning disruptive, packed up & brought him out.
He was very unhappy about the pre-mature departure and apparently put up a struggle and cried quite a bit even at the corridors of SMU.
Anyway, after that morning, I hardly got to see him that day and the next. The following Mon & Tue were my usual working days, with me accompanying him at AAS on Mon afternoon. Then Wed-Fri 7-9 Nov I was away to Hanoi for my department's teambuilding. That evening when I came home at 7pm we had a good time together.
But somehow, since that period, Dylan seems to have been very insecure and cries very loudly & inconsolably for 20 or 30 mins & sometimes on & off for a whole hour. More recently, he would keep looking at the swing and cry till Mel relents and sit on the swing with him. Today, they even swing for 50 mins. Any attempt to stand up he may burst out crying.
Also, lately at busstops or sometimes even at home, he would insist that Mel carry the backpack while holding him, standing up or sitting on the swing. Verbal assurance that she won't forget it just won't do.
It is possible that he might be having some kind of recurring nightmare, as this crying frenzy quite often start as he wakes, and he often run out of the room frantically searching for Mel, crying "Arty" for "Aunty". This is unlike his prior smiles when he wakes. However, he also cries very loudly when he is about to go to sleep, sometimes crying so hard that his tummy hardens / probably even getting cramped that we put some "Ruyi" oil to relax him. Sometimes attemtps to contain/restrain him results in his even more desparate struggles and sometimes bruising himself. Occasionally, he may have been eating nicely seated, and halfway, he suddenly grab the food like fried chicken /sweet corn, and run off to the swing and cry for it to be let down. It takes a lot of energy to be firm, and insist he either put down the food, then sit on the swing, or to continue eating while seated. There's just been so many episodes of this recurring drama this past month!
Thankfully, it's not as if he's only in this sort of state. We do have good times together where he seems happy & keen to look at what Daddy & Mommy are doing / talking about when we have family meals together. But somehow having those moments earlier in the day, eg. having a family meal out where he's all smiles, or bringing him swimming where he has fun & laughter, or going for an outing with a friend and her 4 year old kid in Sentosa etc. don't seem to provide him with the sense of security to get out of relapsing into such episodes. Even RDI practice has become difficult & inconsistent as he may cooperate for a while, and then get really out of sorts. Very volatile situation!
I'm really unsure if this could have anything to do with the Samonas music, which is unlikely as he had heard those tracks previosuly with no issues. And even if this is really due to feeling neglected/ abandoned during those days I was not with him, how can I really help him gain the confidence & security again......
He was very unhappy about the pre-mature departure and apparently put up a struggle and cried quite a bit even at the corridors of SMU.
Anyway, after that morning, I hardly got to see him that day and the next. The following Mon & Tue were my usual working days, with me accompanying him at AAS on Mon afternoon. Then Wed-Fri 7-9 Nov I was away to Hanoi for my department's teambuilding. That evening when I came home at 7pm we had a good time together.
But somehow, since that period, Dylan seems to have been very insecure and cries very loudly & inconsolably for 20 or 30 mins & sometimes on & off for a whole hour. More recently, he would keep looking at the swing and cry till Mel relents and sit on the swing with him. Today, they even swing for 50 mins. Any attempt to stand up he may burst out crying.
Also, lately at busstops or sometimes even at home, he would insist that Mel carry the backpack while holding him, standing up or sitting on the swing. Verbal assurance that she won't forget it just won't do.
It is possible that he might be having some kind of recurring nightmare, as this crying frenzy quite often start as he wakes, and he often run out of the room frantically searching for Mel, crying "Arty" for "Aunty". This is unlike his prior smiles when he wakes. However, he also cries very loudly when he is about to go to sleep, sometimes crying so hard that his tummy hardens / probably even getting cramped that we put some "Ruyi" oil to relax him. Sometimes attemtps to contain/restrain him results in his even more desparate struggles and sometimes bruising himself. Occasionally, he may have been eating nicely seated, and halfway, he suddenly grab the food like fried chicken /sweet corn, and run off to the swing and cry for it to be let down. It takes a lot of energy to be firm, and insist he either put down the food, then sit on the swing, or to continue eating while seated. There's just been so many episodes of this recurring drama this past month!
Thankfully, it's not as if he's only in this sort of state. We do have good times together where he seems happy & keen to look at what Daddy & Mommy are doing / talking about when we have family meals together. But somehow having those moments earlier in the day, eg. having a family meal out where he's all smiles, or bringing him swimming where he has fun & laughter, or going for an outing with a friend and her 4 year old kid in Sentosa etc. don't seem to provide him with the sense of security to get out of relapsing into such episodes. Even RDI practice has become difficult & inconsistent as he may cooperate for a while, and then get really out of sorts. Very volatile situation!
I'm really unsure if this could have anything to do with the Samonas music, which is unlikely as he had heard those tracks previosuly with no issues. And even if this is really due to feeling neglected/ abandoned during those days I was not with him, how can I really help him gain the confidence & security again......
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